Yes, Men Male Privilege Actually Exists

And now another one of Aunt Lynne’s classic rants:

So the extremely sad story taking place in Iowa this week has shown me that people want to talk about immigration and building a stupid, useless border wall but they refuse to talk about the extremely disturbing trend of femicide in this country. Everyone cares more about the immigration status of the alleged killer than they do about the fact that yet again a woman has died because she told a man to leave her alone.

So I shared a story about how after jogging in the park, there were five men waiting for my by my car when I was done and now yes they could’ve been perfectly nice but dammit one of them was leaning on my car and YOU DON’T MESS WITH THE ‘STANG! For God’s sake I had just washed and waxed it and this entitled bastard was putting his damn handprints all over it! At any rate the odds were 50/50 between nice guys or guys who wanted to harm me and ladies, please feel free to back me up, but I didn’t like them odds. So I waited until they moved off. Well, every man I shared this story with decided that I was “paranoid” and “living in fear” and “addicted to being offended.” Suddenly every man I knew was now an expert in MY personal safety and gosh it was so lovely to have MY OWN PERSONAL SAFETY MANSPLAINED TO ME! Because clearly as a woman I AM TOO STUPID TO UNDERSTAND! My ovaries make me cognitively impaired in some way. I even got called a bitch. Well guys, I’d rather be a bitch than dead.

Ok guys, here’s a breakdown of male privilege for you. You can go jogging by yourself in a park without a care in the world. I can’t do that. You can sit alone at a bar waiting for your significant other without some jackass demanding to buy you a drink then telling you that your boyfriend needs to let you have friends and what a nice guy he is. I can’t do that. You can go to the restroom in that bar by yourself and not have to worry about a “nice guy” trying to take advantage of the fact that you’re alone in a relatively secluded part of the bar. And yes guys that’s the real reason we go in groups. It’s not just because we want to talk about you. It’s safety in numbers. That’s male privilege. There’s a whole crapton of things you can do that I can’t, okay gents? DO YOU GET IT NOW?! Because frankly if you don’t I have neither the time nor the crayons to explain it to you and I’m not the jackass whisperer. But please by all means build your damn wall but refuse to renew the Violence Against Women Act. Morons.

This has been another one of Aunt Lynne’s classic rants.

Taking 5 from Take 5

I got some sad news the other day. The place where I fell in love with comedy is closed for the time being. I’m not sure if this is forever, but I am sure that I’m pretty bummed out. The owners are the nicest people and they gave us a home. I met a lot of my comedy friends there and they have been absolutely amazing. I posted about it in Facebook and their support has been overwhelming and I am truly humbled. I may not have a platform, but what I do have is an amazing family of choice. My actual family has also been supportive. I’m not sure what the future holds, but I can honestly say that I’ve chosen my tribe wisely and I’m thankful to all of you. Rest assured, you haven’t heard the last from this sarcastic little ray of sunshine. To all my haters, stay tuned. There’s more to come. Lumos!