Rejected NJ Puppy Mill Law: Proof that Chris Christie Would in Fact Kick Your Puppy


Do NOT let this man near your pets!

Chris Christie rejected a law that would have banned the sale of animals from puppy or kitten mills in the state of New Jersey and proposed stricter penalties for breeders cited for USDA violations. He stated that the proposed law “goes too far.” I have a little message for Mr. Christie:


Mr. Governor, since you tend to use blunt language that matches your wit I’m going to put this in a way you’ll be sure to understand. Are you fucking kidding me? How can you say that a law to protect defenseless animals from over-breeding, inadequate care, and abuse goes too far?



Does this photo go too far?

You claimed that the “three strikes” provision which would have revoked a pet shop or breeder’s license upon being cited for three USDA violations would punish responsible breeders. Mr. Governor, any responsible breeder will tell you that a breeder who has been cited three times for USDA violations is anything but responsible.



What about this one?

Puppy mills are illegal in New Jersey, but there are more than 8,000 out of state puppy mills that do business with consumers in the state of New Jersey. You see, Mr. Governor it’s 2017. We have this thing called the Internet and irresponsible breeders use it to conduct their business with consumers in New Jersey.





Look at this dog and tell me you were justified, sir!

How you can support rejecting this bill in a country where overpopulation is the number one killer of animals is beyond me. Every 11 seconds, a healthy animal is put down in an American animal shelter. In the three minutes it took you to read this far, 16 animals have died. By the time you finish reading this entry in its entirety, assuming you even bother to read it since Lord knows your Party doesn’t have the best track record of actually reading the laws it makes decisions on, an additional 22 animals will be dead. Let that sink in for a moment and that will bring the number of animals killed to 39.


Tell me this cat deserved to suffer so consumers can have access to pets.

Your claim that this bill would have “the unintended consequence of restricting consumer access to pets,” is completely unfounded and downright asinine. Consumers can go to their local animal shelter or rescue organization and adopt a pet for an adoption fee that would be much lower than the cost of purchasing from a breeder or pet store. They can then spend the remainder of what they would’ve spent to purchase an animal on appropriate licensing, food, beds, treats, toys, a session with a certified trainer, and a vet visit.


This is not necessary for New Jersey’s economic growth

This spending will stimulate the state’s economy and help eliminate the need for puppy and kitten mills. The state gets revenue and no animals have to be over-bred, abused, or die. It’s a win-win. Adoption would also have the added benefits of freeing up space in overwhelmed shelters and rescues and removing stray animals from the streets of New Jersey making them safer for animals and humans alike.

Nor is this

I suspect that you might not understand what it is to love and care for animals since you have no pets. I knew there was a reason I didn’t trust you other than your attacks on education funding and your support of Donald Trump. Honestly, sir you are a married man and you have daughters and you still supported Mr. Grab ‘em by the pussy? I guess party politics are more important to you than respect for women. Close any more bridges lately? What? Too soon?

Or this!

I understand you’re pro-business. You might as well walk around with corporate sponsor badges on your suit like a Nascar driver. I don’t harbor any delusions about the Democratic Party either. Frankly I think you should all wear your special interest sponsor badges. At least then we would know exactly what you stand for. However, when being pro-business also means being pro-animal cruelty that, to use your own words, goes too far. I’d hire the actress from Game of Thrones to follow you around ringing a bell and shouting “Shame!,” but I’d rather save that money to donate to my local animal shelters, rescues, and your political opponents. The day you leave office will be a good day for New Jersey.


Lynne Emonds

Animal lover, rescue volunteer, stand-up comedian who makes fun of you, and your dissatisfied constituent

New Season of Doctor Who & Class

The wait is finally over! We have a new season of Doctor Who to watch! There’s plenty for Whovians to be excited about with the new season and the stateside debut of the new spinoff Class.

It’s a season of firsts! It is hard to top the first televised inter-species, same sex kiss. Nevertheless, like Elizabeth Warren, the show’s writers persisted. Pearl Mackie is the first non-white woman cast in the role of the Doctor’s companion. I know it’s about damn time and yes, I’m a pasty white woman saying that. Bill Potts is also the first openly gay companion. Take that, Trump voters!

But in all seriousness, score one for diversity. Maybe we can use this to pave the way for the first female Doctor. Dammit if The Master can regenerate into Missy, it can happen. For the record my picks for the first female Doctor would be Tatiana Maslany, Catherine Zeta Jones, Lucy Lawless, or Emma Watson. However if the Doctor MUST remain male, my top picks are Eddie Redmayne and Tom Felton. Get on it, BBC.


A new Doctor Who spinoff has also premiered stateside. Class is a new series that follows the students and staff of Coal Hill Academy which has been featured on the show since 1963’s An Unearthly Child. It’s a bit darker and grittier than Doctor Who and raises the veil between the everyday world and the things that come through the cracks in the walls of space and time. It’s darker just by virtue of the body count. Seriously I’ve seen two episodes and I can’t be the only one who’s noticed that a crapton of people died.

I have high hopes for this one and I’m not just saying that because we’re about to experience the final season of Orphan Black and I’m desperate to fill the void that’s likely to create in my life. The young cast is pretty talented and the writing is superb so far. My only disappointment is a severe lack of a second Doctor Who spinoff featuring Vastra, Strax, and Jenny. Seriously BBC, get on it!